Whatchoo Talkin’ Bout, Meme?

This is the last cop out post, I swear. I know that I need to get back to really posting something of more worth than these silly questionnaires. That will be my goal for this month; to write and least one meaningful thing each week. But for now you will just have to put up with my silliness one more time.

1. How old do you look? I think for the first time in my life I actually look my age, which is 32. And I actually like that. It makes me feel empowered in some strange sort of way.

2. Where do you live? In our lovely Deseret. For those of you not in the know, that is Utah.

3. Are you waiting for something? I am always waiting for something. And do you know what that is? Me. Yep. Just me. I am the only one holding me back. Quite the epiphany, eh?!

4. What’s one pet peeve of yours that is not common? I hate it when people put trash in the sink.

5. Do you want/have kids?
I have a beautiful little boy.

6. Have you ever thought about converting your religion? No. I feel no need to change religions. Instead I think I will just gather insight and knowledge from many religions and use their guidance in my life.

7. Last shocking news you heard? If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it.

8. What was the last thing you drank? Silk – Chocolate flavored. Tastes like chocolate pudding. YUM!

9. Who do you most look like in your family? Probably my brother. That’s a weird thing for a girl to say, but it’s true.

Check us out, circa 1982. And yes, those are Underoos that I am sporting.

10. If you could have something right now, anything, what would it be? Peace of mind.

11. Where does most of your family live? Most of my immediate family lives in Utah.

12. Where did you grow up? I grew up in Salt Lake City, but my childhood was pretty evenly dispersed between there and Santa Barbara, CA.

13. Where do you want to go on vacation?
Usually I would say Disneyland, but at the moment I really couldn’t say. Weird.

14. Have you ever had a panic attack? Nope.

15. What can’t you wait for? This is a difficult question to answer. I can’t wait for Ollie to start talking, and yet I don’t want him to grow up too fast. I can’t wait until Ollie come bursting through the front door, excited to tell me what he learned at school that day, and yet I love that he is still learning what a cow says and what a square looks like. I am waiting for my little boy to do big boy things, but I still want him to stay my little monkey. So although I can’t wait, I can.

16. When’s the last time you told someone you loved him or her and meant it? I have never told someone I loved them when I didn’t mean it.

17. Have your parents ever smoked pot? Who knows? Doesn’t matter to me one way or the other.

18. Want someone back in your life? I think so, but I don’t know how to approach the matter.

19. What do you order at the bar? Coke or water. Party animal, I know!

20. When was the last time you cried really, really hard? Um….next…..

21. Ever licked someone’s cheek? I think I may have licked my sisters’ cheeks at some point, but I don’t recall. I hear life isn’t complete until you have been licked by Miss Grace.

22. What is your favorite thing to eat with peanut butter? Apples, specifically, Jonagold apples.

23. Where were you on July 4th, 2008? Probably Evanston, WY. I don’t recall.

24. What is your nickname? Jimmy Two Boobs

25. If you could go back in time, how far back would you go? Far enough to punch you in the face while writing this question.

Fifty! It’s Half of One Hundred.

1. What do you add to your coffee? It’s rare that I have straight up coffee. Usually I have one of those incredibly overpriced, crack sugar laced beverages like a white chocolate peppermint mocha. But if and when I do have coffee, I turn it into something similar to the aforementioned drink with half n half and sugar.

2. What are you reading now? Oh many things, my friends, many things. Ok, really just four books. Two on parenting, one true tale of thievery, and one suspense novel. Just guess which one is which! You’ll never guess.
Parenting With Love and Logic
Children the Challenge
The Charlemagne Pursuit
The Man Who Loved Books Too Much: The True Story of Thief, a Detective, and a World of Literary Obsession

3. Do you own a gun? Me, personally, no. But my husband does, so there is one in our home if that counts.

4. Are you registered to vote? Yes

5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments? I didn’t until I had Rocket. And I really only get nervous when I know they are going to be giving him a shot. This is probably the worst time to get nervous since kids are like dogs and can sense fear. I am not afraid of needles, I have eleven piercings for fuck sake. I just hate it when people shove sharp pointed objects into my child.

6. What do you think of hot dogs? I think they are tasty tubes of meat.

7. Favorite Christmas Song? I am quite fond of Oh Come All Ye Faithful. I am NOT a fan of that piece of shit song with the tourette inducing chorus of “si-imply ha-aving a wonderful Christmas time.”

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? I don’t know that I have a preference. I’ll drink whatever is available be it milk or soda.

9. Can you do push ups? I know my bra can do at least two. PAH POW!!

10. What was the name of your first boyfriend/girlfriend? Technically we weren’t boyfriend and girlfriend, but since we did hang out naked in his closet, I will have to go with Adam.

11. What’s your favorite piece of jewelery? My wedding ring.

12. Favorite hobby? Painting or photography.

13. Do you work with people who idolize you? I work with my one year old son. Our working relationship is great but I have been hearing whisperings of nepotism from the other employees.

14. Do you have ADD? I don’t know. I’ve never waited around long enough to find out.

15. What’s one trait that you hate about yourself? I tend to be suspicious of people’s motives.

16. What’s your Middle name? Diane. After me ma.

17. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment.
I should go check on Rocket.
I saw something muchin’ in the meadow, moo, moo, moo.
Shit, I need to do some serious laundry.

18. Name 3 things you bought yesterday. Can’t. I spent up to and including no money, yesterday.

19. Name 3 beverages you regularly drink. Milk, Diet Dr. Pepper and Cafe Mocha.

20. Current worry right now? I plead the fifth.

21. What side do you dress to? It’s more of a circular motion starting with the right foot. It’s complicated.

22. Favorite place to be? At home with my family.

23. How did you bring in the New Year? I believe I wiped the drool off my face and turned over on the couch around 9:30PM. Party at the Watsons!

24. Where would you like to go? Disneyland, obviously. Also Connecticut to see my sister, Jennifer Jennifer Crotch Crotch and her boyfriend, Dieter Dieter Pants on Fire. How did they get these names? Why do you ask, Dogs Pooping?

25. Name three people who will complete this. Your mom, The Pope, and that girl with the frontal dromedary issues.

26. Whose answers do you want to read the most? Your mom’s for sure.

27. What color shirt are you wearing? Pink with green plaid accenting.

28. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? *uncontrollable shuddering*

29. Can you whistle? Sure can.

30. Favorite colors(s)? Puce and ochre. Not really. That’s just what we would tell people when they asked about our wedding colors.

31. Could you be a pirate? Do you mean, how much longer do I plan on being a pirate? I think until ta-mAAAAAARRRR-ow! (Wow that was bad. Couldn’t help it. I blame it on the scurvy.)

32. What songs do you sing in the shower? I don’t usually sing in the shower.

33. Favorite girls name? Diamoniqua, Paradise, and Fonda Peters.

34. Favorite boy’s name? Warren, Daryl, and Tom.

35. What’s in your pocket right now? Wishes and starlight.

36. Last thing that made you laugh? Mr. Mike Rowe. Alright, that’s not entirely true. I totally just cracked myself up with my answer to question 25.

37. Best bed sheets as a child? Disney character sheets.

38. Worst injury you’ve ever had? My episiotomy. Can that be considered an injury?

39. Do you love where you live? Yes

40. How many TVs do you have in your house? One. One is enough.

41. Who is your loudest friend? Depends on the alcohol consumption.

42. How many dogs do you have? None. Not a dog person at. all.

43. Does anyone have a crush on you? I would hope at least one person does.

44. What are the most fun things you ever did? Spending a week in Disneyland with Annie and Jeremy. Going to Italy with my Grandma. Any night hanging out at my parent’s house. (The last one may seem crazy, but you haven’t met my parents.)

45. What are your favorite books? Siddhartha – Hermann Hesse, My Name is Asher Lev – Chaim Potok, and Say Goodnight, Gracie – Julie Reece Deaver.

46. What is your favorite candy? I’m a big sucker for Sixlets.

47. Favorite Team? Rockford Peaches

48. What songs do you want played at your funeral? I have no idea. You pick.

49. What were you doing at 12 AM? On what day? Can you be more specific? Because right now I have 11, 710 options to choose from.

50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up? Wow! It’s really 8:30! Sweet.

#34 30X365 LilSass

Hello my lemon lime flavored puke compadre; my Jordan Catalano lovin’ partner in crime. Let’s get drunk on bacon and roll around in a pile of Candy Cane Jo Jo’s.

Everyday Life – That’s My Boy!

Rocket’s Masterpiece

Sorry I’m Late

I meant to post this yesterday but ended up spending the day with my mom, instead. It was great! She took us to breakfast and bought a ton of really great books for Oliver. There were several that I remembered from my childhood which is always fun.

Anyhooo….on to the questions!

Our first question comes from Moonspun.

Name three favorite movies you could watch over and over (like the kind if I came to visit and I hadn’t seen them, you’d sit me right down in front of the tv to make my life right). and name three reasons you love them.

Well first off, I would have to say Young Frankenstein by Mel Brooks.

Reason 1: It has Gene Wilder as Dr. Frankenstein for pete’s sake! How could you not love that?!
Reason 2: Madaline Kahn. Need I say more?
Reason 3: Some of the silliest and most clever dialogue I have ever heard.

Second, I would say, Meet Me In St. Louis with Judy Garland.

Reason 1: I am a HUGE sucker for a good musical. And I am not talking this Mama Mia bullshit.
Reason 2: The costumes and settings are beautiful.
Reason 3: I love the family dynamic of the Smith’s. They are a great bunch of characters.

Last, I would say Pride and Prejudice (the version with Keira Knightly). Now while I am not a big Keira “I have several rows of teeth, like shark” Knightly, I LOVE LOVE LOVE this movie. I think I watched it five times in one day. No shit.

Reason 1: The love story is so wonderful I get goose bumps just thinking about it.
Reason 2: The dialogue. Of course being written by Jane Austen, you know it has brilliant, sharp wit.
Reason 3: Incredibly beautiful cinematography.

The next question comes from Mind of a Mad Woman. I believe this is the first time she has been to my blog (unless she has been sneaking around like a ninja). So welcome!

If you had to choose between living in a house with no roof in a constantly rainy climate OR living in a city with walkways that are all hot coals and you have no shoes (or any mode of transport besides walking)..which would you choose?

I would definitely choose the latter. I think with the first I would go absolutely crazy after a while. Where as with the second choice, I think, I would end up losing all feeling in the bottom of my feet and it wouldn’t matter one bit what I was walking on.

The third question is from Mumma Boo. Another new reader! Yeah! Welcome to you too!

If you could only choose one form of creative expression to do for the rest of your life, what would it be and why?

Painting, without a doubt. There are limitless stories and emotions that one can convey with painting. And there are endless options for materials that I can use for my painting. So the ideas, while they may wane at times, will never really run out.

Next we have my long time blogging friend, Jess. Hi, Jess!

Dear Sus, WTF?

Dear Jess,
That’s what she said.
Love, Sus.

And last but not least, another new reader, Mystern. Welcome to you, as well!

What’s the difference between happiness and joy?

I read somewhere that happiness depends on our circumstances, whereas joy depends on our emotional well-being. I would have to say this is a pretty good way of looking at those two things.

Thank you to all who sent in your questions. And to all the new readers, I hope you come back soon!

What’s the Matter? Cat Got Your Tongue?

So tomorrow I will be answering the questions for the Ask Sus Anything Your Heart Desires panel, but so far only three people have left a question.

Really? That’s it? Only three? It can be any question in the whole wide world, people. Don’t be afraid.

Maybe you are waiting until the last minute?

Yes, I’m sure that must be it.

I Used to Paint.

Remember that?

I do.

“Defeat” 2002
36″x48″ – oil and charcoal on canvas.

“Guitarist” 2000
24″x24″ – oil on canvas

“Woman in Repose” 2003
18″x24″ – watercolor on paper

I used to draw, too.

“Figure Study” 2002
18″x24″ – graphite on paper

“Marjorie” 1998
16″x20″ – graphite on paper

I am going to make a serious effort to start doing that again. It is good for my psyche.

Call Me, “Grandpa!” “What?!” “Just Do It!”

Today I was checking out what various searches had brought people to my site and this was among the list:

as your aunt i order you to bend over

What for? What are you planning on doing? Aunt Becky, was that you? Cheeky.

On another note, don’t forget to submit your questions for this Monday!

Everyday Life – This Kid’s Cuteness? Ridiculous.

An Interpretive Dance I Like to Call, “The Bullet Point.”

Excuses for neglecting my blog (feel free to believe whichever you choose):

• I was attacked by a mob of angry chickens.
• Damn those holidays. They take up all your time.
• I have attempted to have some semblance of a life outside of my home/away from my computer.
• I developed an unnatural fear of cheese and avoided mice of all kinds.
• I didn’t feel like writing.
• I am a giant, insensitive douche.
• Bacon.

Kickass New Rocket Tricks:

• He will act out and mimic the sound for the following animals: dog, cow, chicken, rooster, bear, fish, lion, monkey, horse, sheep, and elephant.
• He is walking!



• Musical instruments he will pretend to play: drums, fiddle, and guitar.
• He gives high fives, bumps fists, and gives eskimo kisses.
• When asked what The Count says, he responds with , “Ah! Ah! AAAAAAH!”
• He is learning to feed himself. A bath is occasionally required after one of these sessions.





• He headbangs in his car seat whenever we play any Metallica while driving.
• He will also headbang to Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. That song, apparently, fuckin’ rocks.
• When the theme music for Family Guy begins, he will immediately stop whatever he is doing and intently watch the television.
• You can ask him to bring you a specific book from his collection and he will bring it right to you.

A Photo Montage I Like to Call, “Playing Catch Up.”

Oliver’s 1st Birthday




That last two photos are not a photoshopped joke. We actually gave him a gigantic piece of cake to trash. He munched on this for about twenty minutes. After the party it took another two hours of cruising round and round the couch before he finally passed out on the floor.

Gingerbread, Bottle Rockets, Gun Powder, Oh My!

Your Assignment For Next Week:
Submit a question (or more, if you would like) to the Ask Sus Anything Your Heart Desires panel. You can submit your question(s) in the comments of this post. Answers will be given a week from today.