“That’s gayer than poop on your wiener.”
– said by my dad while at lunch last week.
Q: So you are awfully chatty today. Are you paying attention to someone else?
Junior: Sorry, just don’t have much to say.
Q: Are you deep in thought or something? Do you want me to stop bothering you?
Junior: No, I am just not talkative; that’s all.
Q: No really…that’s fine. No biggie
Junior: I really just don’t have anything to say. Nothing is wrong. I just don’t.
Q: Junior….When do we ever have anything of importance to say? I mean really. Refer to the “jettison out my butt wound” comment from yesterday.
Junior: So I guess it was you who sent me that Old 97’s song, “Question,” right?
Junior: Right!? LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN! Gosh! I have something to say and you don’t even listen to me! I hate you!!
Q: Fuck off, ass. You piece of shit. And I thought you sent that to me.
Junior: Ok, fuck! I have no idea who sent me that damn song. Anyways, I can play it.
Q: On itunes? Me too!!
Junior: Shut up, dick; on the guitar.
Junior: You are so lame!
Q: See, now that is what I like to call a good old fashioned chat session!
Junior: I know! I must have gotten my second wind.
Q: Excellent….because this conversation was seriously lacking.
Junior: Well not anymore, Mofo! Junior let his balls drop! ITS ON! Who wants me on THEIR corporate team!?
Q: I would totally have you on your corporate team. . . not mine, though.
Junior: I would have me on mine, so there!
1. Jeremy. I think this goes without saying 🙂
2. My piano. I try to play every single day.
3. Barnes and Noble. It keeps me well stocked in books and is the location of my weekly visit with my dear friend, Heather
4. Sugarhouse BBQ Pulled Pork Sandwich. Oh man, it’s like an orgasm on a bun.
5. My “I don’t have any idea how to manage this mop of hair, so I will just put it up” clip.
Apparently I have been tagged. That was what I used to yell out as my safe word when we would play TV tag as kids.
What was I doing 10 years ago:
I had been going to the U of U off and on, trying to get my art degree. However, I wasn’t very motivated at the time, and so spent most of the time wasting my life working at Kinko’s. That was until I met my knight in shining armor, Jeremy, who encouraged me to go back to school.
5 snacks I enjoy:
1.) Apples with Peanut Butter
3.) Peanut Butter and Honey Sandwiches
4.) Nutella (it’s totally a snack)
5.) Wheat Thins
5 things on my to do list today:
1.) Wrap late Mother’s Day, early Father’s Day gift for parents.
2.) Make list of music I have in my iTunes for Jeremy.
3.) Clean up house
4.) Feel like I have actually accomplished something in relation to what I am being paid for.
5.) Send out maps for Jeremy’s qualifying round.
5 things I would do if I were a billionaire:
1.) Give a portion of it to family and friends, so that we could all quit and just travel and hang out together.
2.) Rent out Disneyland for the day.
3.) Buy “I and the Village” by Marc Chagall.
4.) Get an apartment in New York
5.) Work as a librarian in an elementary school.
5 bad habits of mine:
1.) Forgetting my keys.
2.) Leaving clutter around.
3.) Stacking unnecessary shit on my nightstand.
4.) Forgetting to start the dishwasher after I have loaded it.
5 places I have lived:
1.) Santa Barbara, CA
2.) Salt Lake City, UT
3.) North Salt Lake City, UT
4.) Roy, UT
5.) Kaysville, UT
5 people to get to know better (consider yourselves tagged!)
1.) Ashley Blair
2.) Heather Stratton
3.) Joe Shawcroft
4.) Sam Woods
5.) Amber Quilter (I know you don’t have a blog, but that doesn’t mean I am going to stop trying)
My brother and I used to IM all the time when he was in grad school. (Yes, he did graduate despite all my efforts to keep him at my educational level.) I came across some of the old conversations I had saved and thought it would be unfair of me to hoard these from the world. So without further ado, here is the first installment of Junior and Q. (For those not up to speed, I am Q, my brother is Junior.)
Junior: I have been focusing on keeping this turd from prairie doggin’ in. Maybe I should just jettison it from my butt wound. What do you think?
Q: I think that is fucking nasty. . . and you totally should.
Junior: Ok, I will be right back
Junior: Phew. It’s about time someone put a bullet in that dog!
Q: Sick. Took you long enough. Have to flush midway?
Junior: It was a big one!