Quick Update

I went to the doctor’s today to begin my weekly crotch ramming. At least that was how it felt when the doctor was checking my cervix. Shit that was uncomfortable. Anyways, Rocket as apparently dropped and is all nice and cozy with his head in my pelvis. This is a huge relief. The doctor thought for a while that he might be breech. Not the case. Phew!

I was very shocked, though, to find out that he had dropped. When the hell did that happen?! I haven’t noticed any difference in the way I am carrying him and I certainly haven’t experience this “lightening” bullshit that everyone talks about. I still can’t breathe worth a shit. Sometimes I swear the kid has one hand around each of my lungs and randomly squeezes them for entertainment.

Then she (Yes; I refuse to go to a male gyno. You don’t have a cooter, you don’t have me as your patient.) asks if I have been having any contractions. I say that I have no idea. I don’t have any idea what they are supposed to feel like. She says, “Well it seems that you are having one right now.” Of course, I reply in complete shock, “Really?! I don’t feel anything!” Then she points how that my stomach is really tight. I always just figured that was Rocket trying to blast his way out of my stomach. Seems I may have been having this happen for a while now and I didn’t even know it! Is this normal? I just keep thinking about all the shows I have seen where pregnant women are portrayed and at that first contraction you would think someone had shoved a welding torch up their ass. What is up with that?

Anyways, looks like things are right on schedule. And I am currently panicking and rejoicing at the same time. It’s a very weird feeling.

On a more festive note, I love all the entries to the contest. They are awesome! My pumpkin, sadly, no longer resembles the Dark Lord. Looks more like the Dark Lord trying to bust a grumpy*. Oh well. At least I got a cool picture.

*take a shit.

6 Responses

  1. Bust a grumpy. I love it. So I had those strange “invisible” contractions (my own term) with both boys. If you poked my tummy it felt like I was smuggling an over-pumped basketball when they’d come on. But no pain. And wtf? Don’t you feel kinda cheated? I never experienced any lightening bullshit either! He was UP in my lungs and POUNDING on my bladder till the day. he. popped. out! HA! I think it’s a trick they all play on us. Yep, fool with the prego ladies’ minds. It’s a conspiracy.

  2. Here’s hoping you don’t bust a grumpy when Rocket decides to liftoff!

  3. Oh, I was having massive contractions from seven months on, to the point where I was hospitalized three times, and then they stuck me on bed rest. I figured that when it was “time” that I’d be all, Oh, that’s nothing. I’ m used to that.

    Yeah, NOT quite. When you get the REAL contractions, you’ll know, believe me.

    Oh, and I won’t even have a male dentist, forget about the gyno. Only trouble is that she wasn’t on call and a guy had to deliver my son. At that point, though, he could have been a fucking kangaroo for all I cared. Love the pumpkin, and it looks like you won the pumpkin carve. Congrats!

  4. Yea, I never knew what the heck was going on when I was pregnant. The first contractions I had were very mild, I wasn’t even too sure they actually were contractions. I just felt mildy uncomfortable and sick. And I was in labor for 28 hours. I wanted to be one of those people that has the baby after like, 4 hours. It’s one of the reasons I only had one kid.

  5. HAHAHA!! Bust a grumpy…if you don’t mind, I may borrow that. 🙂

    Those contractions are freaky. I, too, had no idea I was having them at 8 months until my doctor told me. I had some painful ones about 3 weeks before my son was born. I really thought, “This is it – LET’S GO!” about 17 times before they stopped. This boy had no intention of leaving – we had to induce labor!

    OH! This is totally off the topic, but I just read that you LOVE Young Frankenstein (I’m a little slow on the draw these days). That is my all-time favorite movie!

  6. When I was at about 37 weeks with Gabriel, my midwife went off on some long analogy comparing my cervix to rotten banana. Or that it was a banana, but not rotten enough? I can’t remember the details. I DO remember that I was distressed.

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