My Friend and I Have the BEST Conversations

The name of said friend has been removed since the opening line of the email is a bit on the personal side.

To: Sus
From: Friend
Subject: It Burns!!!

Friend We are still on for tonight for sure, but I have a UTI. It sucks. I think I got it from having to use stupid condoms!

Me UGH! That is awful. I am still good for tonight. Unless your cooter catches on fire!

Friend If it does, you can put it out with a gush. LOL Eeeeeewwwwwww!

Me Hahahah sick. Then people will be like, “Why does it smell like hot amniotic fluid and burnt hair?!”

Friend And finally we would have a whole place to ourselves!

Me BBWWWWWAAAAAHHAHAHAHAHAH! But then again, would we really want to hang out in the stench of charred curlies and placenta puddles?

Friend Yeah, we would just hold fresh cups of coffee under our noses.

Me Oh yes of course. BRILLIANT!

3 Responses

  1. hahahahaha!!!! this has GOT to be the same friend who had the dream about you going to the bathroom. Or was she going to the bathroom? AT any rate, must be the same girl cause you can’t possibly have that many awesome friends with sick senses of humor. Or can you ….?

  2. LilSass: Nope! Totally different friend :). And this particular friend has the sickest sense of humor of them all!!

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