12 Weeks

Oliver is 3 months old! THREE MONTHS!! This means that exactly one year has passed since I started this blog. I think that is the longest I have had a blog (which have been many…but usually fizzle out after a few months.)

A last week I took him to his 2 month follow up (a little late, I know). Doc said he was the epitome of what a two month old should be. Growing like a weed, this kid is! He is now 12 lbs 9 oz and 24 3/4 in. TAAA-AAALL!!

Oliver has had a couple sessions of what is lovingly known as the “PURPLE FACED SCREAM OF DEATH!!” You know; where they scream and scream, until they scream them self sick, and you can’t figure out what to do to help them. Awesome. I asked the doctor about this and told him that the only way I have found to calm him down is to feed him. Which is crazy to me, since he had eaten for a good 30 minutes, just 45 minutes before!

So the doctor asked me how much I was able to pump at a time. I tell him 2-3 oz out of each side, but that I am sure he is getting much more than that when drinking “straight from the carton.” Then I tell him that I can get up to 8 oz per side, if I am engorged. He starts bowing to me, like he is Wayne meeting Alice Cooper! Apparently this is impressive. He tells me, not to worry, it is probably just a phase. (In fact this hasn’t really happened for about a week now. So hopefully that was a short lived phase. God willing.)

This visit, as I am sure most of you mother’s remember, was also the time for his first set of immunizations. First off, let me say that NO FIRST TIME MOTHER should ever…I repeat..EVER…have to go through that alone. That SUCKED!! And no; Jeremy didn’t abandon me. I was a dip shit and gave him the wrong time for the appointment. The flying solo was my fault.

The nurse told me that she would have to give him a series of three shots. Two in one leg; one in the other. She told me hold him in my lap, clutching his upper body to me, because he would flinch when she STABS HIM IN THE LEG. (Ok she didn’t do that. She was very careful and sweet about the whole ordeal. Didn’t help though.) You should have seen the look on his face!! It was shock, followed by a SCREAM, and look that said, “You let her do this to me?! You totally betrayed me! DAMN YOU!!”

While he was in the midst of hysteria, the nurse sticks him with the next shot. And of course it’s another round of, “WWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!” Then she tells me that I need to turn him around so she can give him the last shot. So I do, and he settles down a little, continuing to whimper.

Until he is jammed with the last needle. This time he looks at me like, “ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME WITH THIS SHIT!” Tears are streaming down his face. Tears are streaming down my face. It was awful. And as sweet and gentle as the nurse was trying to be, I hated her for the five minutes it took for this to occur. I wanted to stab her needle in her fucking eye and yell, “How you like that, Bitch?! Huh?! Huh?!”

I could never actually stab anyone. I really bad with a Capri Sun. (Thank you, Daniel Tosh.)

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11 Responses

  1. Aww he’s really so adorable. Sorry you had to suffer the first shots alone 😦 so sad to have to put them through that.

  2. Look at him! He is so adorable. I totally remember going through the shots and thinking, couldn’t they do that differently? Give them sugar water or something like they did when he got circumcised. It is just so sad to watch.

  3. Hopefully you never get a nurse who leaves fingerprint bruises on your son’s legs because she’s gripping him so fiercely. Because that? Really sucked.

  4. Well hello my lil punkin Rocket!!

    JUST as I was beginning to read this I thought to myself, “Hmmmm I wonder if she’s going to vaccinate?” And voila there it was in the next paragraph.

    I am making no statement about your choice … I am just fascinated about all parenting decisions – breastfeeding, vaccines, circumcisions, darth vader costumes, etc.

  5. Poor little cutie! Yeah, I never went alone, and I made my husband hold him 😉

    Just wait. It seems like a never-ending stabfest for quite a while. I hate how they give so many at once and so close together.

  6. Oh I hate the appointments when they get shots! With my first, I had to go out to answer a question for the receptionist while the nurse was setting up her arsenal – she said she would wait – I came back and she hadn’t waited. I was SO MAD! Dante was, of course, hysterical. I sat in the exam room for 20 minutes after we were done, nursing him to make him feel better.

  7. I kinda wanted to cry like that when I got a tetanus shot a month ago.

    Just kidding.

    Sort of.

  8. Sus, he is freakin’ adorable. You BETTER keep your blog going, you’ve got a loyal audience totally in love with what you have to say, not to mention Rocket!
    Shots and needles suck. Period. There is NO good way to do it. We purposefully waited until lil moonspun was older to get her immunizations. They don’t suck any less when they are older and you can tell them. In fact, they suck more. When she was 5 it took me and two nurses to hold her still enough for 5 seconds to get her second MMR shot. It never gets better.
    In fact I told lil moonspun just the other day if we couldn’t get her sick with chicken pox soon, she might have to get a shot. She nearly burst into tears right then and there.
    Anyone have some live chicken pox virus they can send me?

  9. The good thing is that he will never remember your total betrayal when he’s grown. Well that’s what they say. My theory is they keep those latent memories hidden deep until the processes of puberty pop them loose and that’s why there turn into total shits later.

    My daughter has been talking about being a nurse, but her biggest hangup is having to give shots. She doesn’t think she can do it.

  10. Aw. Those first shots and that stunned, betrayed look on your baby’s face are the worst.

    But Rocket’s adorable! May I admire him?

  11. The sad thing about it is that you have to go in for more. . .make sure to follow with tylenol to take the edge off for the rest of the day.

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