The Ins and Outs

As of yesterday, Oliver has officially been out of my womb for as long as he was in it. Yep, Ollie’s 9 months old!! That’s only three months away from a year old. How did that happen?! In just three short months, I will have a one year old. I will stop referring to him in months when asked his age. (Perhaps not, though. I may continue doing this until he is at least out of high school. * Hypothetical Conversation* Oliver: “Mom, can I go out with (insert name of hot chick here) on Saturday?” Me: “Absolutely not, young man. Not until you are at least 192 months old!”)

I know my posts have become few and far between. You don’t have to tell me that. And why, you ask, have my blogging efforts become so fleeting? Let me tell you.

I apparently gave birth to a mountain goat-cheetah hybrid.

Oliver went from crawling to climbing, pulling himself up, and cruising all over everything in less than a month. Jeremy and I have been removed from our position as, “mom” and “dad,” and are now lovingly referred to as, “jungle” and “gym.” And our house would be the photo featured next to the article titled, “Not Childproof.” I am constantly pulling him away from the stairs, my books, the TV. He just barely missed dropping a toy inside one of our speakers before Jeremy caught him. It has been a nonstop project of moving CDs, blocking off areas to play in, shoving plastic covers into electrical outlets, and removing treasured novels from his lightening fast little mitts, before he completely destroys them.

Fortunately there is the other side of life with Oliver. The side where we are watching him learn and discover and grow, and not almost light himself on fire or snort that last line of coke. (I KID, I KID!) These are some of the recent skills he has attained:

  • Using the light switch to turn the lights on and off.
  • Feeding himself cheerios, small banana chunks, and whatever else he find on the floor before I catch him.
  • Pulling himself to a standing position, against the ottoman, where he chills out for a relaxing, educational episode of WordWorld.
  • Throwing his sippy cup on to the floor and laughing after mommy picks it up again and again AND AGAIN.
  • Flipping himself upside-down any chance he gets. He’s our little dare devil!
  • Turning the pages of his books when you read to him, which he loves! He will sit for hours (Or so I would guess. One can only read Dr. Seuss and PD Eastman for so long.) while you read to him.
  • Stretching his arms over his head when I say the phrase, “Sooooo big!”

Sadly, however, Oliver has stopped sleeping through the night. I think he is going through a serious, “OH MY GOD! MOMMY, DON’T LEAVE ME!” phase. He will only sleep in two hour stretches unless I am holding him or he is sleeping in our bed. So, one could say, it has been a rough, sleepless few months. If anyone has any pointers or suggestions, I am all ears. I started out using the Babywise method, but decided to tell that book and its philosophies to go fuck itself. I was really tired of listening to Oliver scream himself to sleep every night and hated that I had wasted all those months when I could have, nay SHOULD HAVE, been rocking him to sleep. So now we are back at square one. Oye vey.

Things with my past job have finally come to a close, so I am now free to speak about that. Back in April, the company I was working for, eliminated my postion and replaced it with a part-time in the office position. As you may recall I was working from home so that we didn’t have to put Ollie in daycare. The two main reasons for avoiding daycare, I think anyone could guess.

1. It’s expensive as fuck.
2. We don’t want some 18 year old floozy raising our child during his fundamental years. We’ll save the floozy for later.

Anyways, long story short, they offered me the part-time position, which I declined. First of all, working FULL-TIME, my entire paycheck would have gone to paying for daycare. How in the hell did you expect me to pay for daycare on half the pay and no benefits. Go suck a goat. So, after we parted ways (on very good terms, I might add! My boss even offered to give me a good reference if needed. This fact will be important later on.), I immediately applied for unemployment.

Well, I was denied. Why, do you ask? Because my employer told Workforce Services that I was fired!! WH-WH-WHAAT?!!! I was furious!! Okay, actually I was more disgusted than anything. My boss is a bishop in the Mormon religion (that’s a very important calling, for those not in the know. Equivalent to a priest or a rabbi, I would believe.), and he flat out lied. I was flabbergasted. Of course, I appealed their decision, went through the whole court hearing shebang and DA DA DA DA!!! was denied yet again. So whatever, fuck them, I don’t care anymore, moving on.

I love being able to stay home with Oliver. It has definitely been an adjustment becoming a single income family, but we are making it work. And I can’t express enough to Jeremy how grateful I am that he is taking on such a huge burden to enable me to stay home to raise our son. It means more to me than he will ever know. Truth be told, I don’t miss working for that place at. all. It was “punch yourself in the face to pass the time” boring. However, it was not all bad. The pay was nice and the perks were fantastic. I received various awards and merchandise. Some of the kickass things I received were my Nikon D40 camera, my iPod Touch, Jeremy’s iPod Nano, our Playstation 3, and Jeremy’s Skycaddie. So that part of the job we will definitely miss. The rest of it….go shove it up your ass.

On a happier note, Jeremy and I just had our 5 year anniversary! It’s seems like we just got married. Time is just screaming by these days. I have loved every day I have been with Jeremy. He is my rock, my knight in shining armor, the Marshall to my Lily. I love you, baby!!

That picture is from our recent trip to Zions. And, no, you are not seeing things. My hair is gone. Short. I love it!! I had reached my limit of the amount of hair I was willing to have ripped out by a curious little boy. I will grow it back in the future, but for now, I am totally digging it. And I was able to donate almost two feet of hair to Locks of Love. So that was pretty sweet.

I will try to write a bit more frequently, but for now here is another picture of the reason most of you come to this blog (don’t try back-peddling, I’m on to you….) Until next time!

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8 Responses

  1. Yay, posticity!!! I love the haircut. Congrats on the anniversary. Ollie’s still cute as fuck. Don’t tell my mom I said a bad word in your comments section.

  2. Hey! Great to hear an update and get my fix in Rocket pictures. Those eyes undo me everytime. And I think I say that in every comment. But so what, it’s true!
    Lil moonspun went through a phase of being nocturnal for a while. It was a phase. I don’t believe in letting kids cry. If you have to snuggle with him for a while, I think that’s fine.
    And yea, short hair is for sure a mama thing. Have you stopped wearing dangly earring yet? I wore studs only until lil moonspun was in kindergarden.
    Enjoy those moments, life does fly by!
    YOu are amazed you have a 9 month old, how the hell did I get a 9 YEAR old???

  3. I love the hair! I just want to see it in person! Love you guys!

  4. Holy crap, he’s getting so big! I’m glad to hear that you and your family are doing so well. Don’t be a stranger!

  5. Good god that kid just gets cuter and cuter!

  6. Crap, I miss seeing you guys on Tuesdays!!! Love you all.

  7. Yeah, time really does start to fly when you have a baby. Well, the days are sometimes very, very long, but the years are short, just like your hair. Love it!!!

  8. Nine months! Damn. You may not refer to him in months after he’s one, but other people sure will. Oh, my baby is 14 mos. 18 mos, even 24 mos. wtf?

    I just recently cut off about 12 inches of my own hair (couldn’t donate it though, I dye mine) and I still have hair past my bra strap. I’m thinking about cutting the rest of it off. Not because I have a baby though, mostly because I think I have lice.

    Maybe you can find a job to do like Badass, with the answering the phone from home kind of thing. Or online tutoring? I’ve heard of that before. I also knew someone who took orders for a catalog company from home. Maybe it’s worth looking in to.

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