Oh So Many Facts About Me

I am happily married.

I never thought I would get married….not because I didn’t want to, but because I thought I was too weird.

I have a degree in painting.

I graduated Cum Laude.

The possibility of pooping in front of my husband while giving birth was almost enough to stop me from having children.

I can’t go anywhere without a book to read.

My favorite food is spaghetti.

I think that cheese is the MOST DISGUSTING thing ever to be created.

I have thrown up in one of those ridiculously small (believe me you don’t notice this until you have to use one) barf bags on an airplane….and then proceeded to leave it on my seat when I left.

I can sing the alphabet backwards starting with any letter (i.e. start with Q and end with R).

I am double jointed in my fingers and elbows, which makes for some hilarious party tricks.

I grind my teeth at night when I sleep.

My body tempurature rises to a feverish state when I am sleeping…so much so that I sleep with the windows open and the fan on even on the dead of winter.

As far as I am concerned Candy is one of the four major food groups.

I used to be babysat by Anthony Edward (you know Dr. Greene from E.R.). No joke.

I have performed a singing telegram at the airport.

My nude photo has been published in a book.

I love peeling glue off of things. One time a coworker of mine wrote out, “This is for you, Sus!” in glue on the counter at work, just so I would be able to scratch it off.

I HATE HATE HATE reality shows. I can’t stand all the bickering. Seriously. Where do they find these assholes?!

I have had stitches a total of 8…wait…scratch that…I just had a kid…make that nine times.

I don’t know if this is the actual term, but I think I have anticipation anxiety. The thought of doing something that scares me, terrifies me more than actually doing the thing I thought I was afraid of.

I love to make people laugh, but only by what I say or write. If I have to act anything out (like in charades), I won’t do it. I get really shy and embarrassed.

I love swearing just a little too much.

I am a parent. Weird.

If someone takes a long time to make an obvious point, it pisses me off and I have a hard time not finishing their thought for them.

I like things that are concise.

I love anyone who is humorous through cleverness and wit.

I abhor anyone who jokes at someone else’s expense, except when it is done to their face and they asked for it.

I am a Leo, but fit none of the typical characteristics of that sign. I think I was born under the wrong moon.

I think my Shui is Feng-ed.

I sometimes think I must have won the drawing for the “greatest family in the world” contest. How else would you explain my luck in being a member of the greatest family in the world?

I just barely had my wisdom teeth removed last year.

When I had my wisdom teeth taken out, I didn’t have dental insurance and couldn’t afford to be put under. So the dentist suggested that I take Valium. He said it would help me to relax. He said I would feel my wisdom teeth being pulled, but I wouldn’t care. That was bull shit. You care. You care a lot! You just can’t do anything about it.

I would love to work as a librarian at an elementary school.

I hate public speaking, and yet I keep taking jobs that require me to give sales presentations. What the hell is wrong with me?

I could watch Rocket sleep for hours. I love the way he smiles and occasionally laughs in his sleep.

I have a hard time feeling comfortable in large crowds. This is when my shyness really comes out.

Whenever someone tells me that I can’t do something, I always say, bull shit…and prove them wrong.

This happened one of the first times I was hanging out with my husband (then boyfriend). We were in front of one of those toy claw machines and I asked him for a dollar to win a prize. He said, “No one ever wins anything from these things.” To which I replied, “Wanna make a bet?” Two seconds later I was handing him the stuffed parrot I had pulled from the machine.

I like to do things as fast as possible.

My hands shake. People think it is necessary to point this out as if I don’t know. I’ve never understood that. Frankly, I feel really stupid when they do that.

I am addicted to Guitar Hero.

I am also addicted to Tetris.

I think these go along with my love of doing things as fast as possible. I love the need for instantaneous reactions with these games.

I’ve realized that I read too fast. I am reading the words but not absorbing the information. I came to this conclusion when I couldn’t tell my friend about the plot of a book I had just finished reading.

I would like to be able to give better summarizations on the things that I read.

I wish I was as outgoing and confident as my sisters.

Oh I have confidence, don’t get me wrong. It’s just not as immediate as theirs.

In the two and 1/2 months that Rocket has been alive, it has been impossible for me to drive with him in the car, without giving him a kiss first and telling him that I love him. Call it OCD, but I have actually stepped back out of the car to walk around to the back to do this.

I am madly in love with “mixed-tapes.” I love making song mixes for people and I love it when people make them for me.

I take my song mixes very seriously. Every song is picked very carefully. And I always try to find songs that I think will mean something special to that person.

If I ask you to listen to a song, I REALLY want you to listen. Don’t start up a conversation after the first few seconds. Don’t walk around a straighten up. There is a reason I am asking you to sit here with me. I don’t do this often. It’s only 3 minutes of your life. I don’t think it is too much to ask.

I love the feeling of being so tired that you can hardly stand it. I will force myself to stay awake as long as possible to prolong this sensation. It’s like self-inflicted insomnia.

It is impossible for me not to tear up when I see someone else crying. Doesn’t matter if these are tears of joy or sorrow.

I hate that I cry. I think being emotional makes me look weak.

I just realized that alot of these things have been things I don’t like about me. Time for a little positivity, eh?!

I LOVE LOVE LOVE to play the piano.

I can quote lines from movies that I haven’t actually seen.

I was once selected to be the youth government representative for the state of Utah for an exchange program in New Zealand.

Looking back, I think this is hilarious. I am the least politically minded person I know.

I love to bake. There is usually some form of baked good sitting on our kitchen counter.

I also love to cook. I often (ok always) watch the Food Network to come up with new ideas.

I have yet to actually try any of them.

I haven’t been an active church member in almost 14 years. The funny thing is that I feel closer to God or whatever higher power you want to believe in, now, then I ever did going to church. I also feel more open to experiencing things that are spiritual in nature. I often wonder why it would be this way now?

I struggle with being cynical.

I once worked as a reading tutor at our local elementary school. It was one of the greatest experiences of my life and I would do it again, in a heart beat.

One of my life goals is to illustrate a children’s book. It doesn’t even matter to me if it is ever published.

I wish I had a better singing voice. I can carry tune, but I have a “sacrament hymn” singing voice, very soft and sweet. I wish it had a little more umph.

If I had a better singing voice, I would also hope that I would be brave enough to actually sing in front of people.

I will sing when playing Rock Band, but that is not the same.

I always wanted to be an animator for Disney. Not following this dream is the only regret I have.

I am counting down the days until Rocket is old enough to truly enjoy going to Disneyland with me. Only 1,387 to go.

When I play Tetris, I don’t ever look at the shape of the piece. I only need to see the hint of its color in the corner of my eye.

I used to make up stories about kidnappers coming to our house. Apparently I wasn’t getting enough attention from the parentals.

I once stole a pack of Certs from the grocery store, when I was seven. It’s my first memory of feeling like a total piece of shit.

I would pay upwards of a hundred dollars just to have someone play with my hair. LOVE IT.

I have just recently become comfortable having female friends. My lack of fashion skills and love of toilet humor make me feel like the black sheep of the female species.

I am not afraid to admit that I can and have eaten an entire package of Oreos in under two days…by myself.

I used to be a terrible liar.

My husband once pointed out that I would repeat a question if I didn’t want to answer it. Like I was buying time.

Bad move on his part. Now I am an excellent liar…BBWWWWAAAHAHAHA.

I actually try to be totally honest in everything I do. It’s so much easier to be a truthful person.

It makes me feel really good about myself when my mom tells me what a good job she thinks I am doing with Rocket.

I really hope that I have the same relationship with Rocket as I do with my parents.

I am kind of a recluse and have no problem going to concerts or movies by myself.

I honestly prefer to go to movies, at the theater, by myself.

If we are watching a movie at home, though, the more the merrier. And the commentary from the peanut gallery is highly encouraged as long as it is full of mockery and humor.

I think Mystery Science Theater is one of the greatest shows every televised.

I love nothing more than climbing into a bed with freshly washed sheets.

I hate making the bed.

I am allergic to mosquitoes. The bites get enormous. It looks like I took one from the pitching machine at the batting cages.

Sadly, I attract mosquitoes more than anyone I have ever met. I think this has to do with the great amount of body heat I put off, along with the ten pounds of sugar I eat on a daily basis.

I love watching musicals.

People who use the word “ain’t” make me want to vomit.

The first time I used a lawn mower I was 23.

I permed my hair once. I could have been a stand in for Dee Snyder’s hair. It was not good.

I have never been able to touch the bottom of the deep end of a swimming pool. No matter how hard I try to sink, I just pop right back to the surface.

At 31 you would think I would be on my career path by now. I don’t think I ever will be.

I need to work on my ability to follow through. I have a ton of ideas but have yet to make any come to fruition.

That makes me sound lazy. I’m really not.

Maybe it’s not so much about follow through as it is about prioritizing.

I would like to have an exhibit of my photography.

I am very sensitive. I used to be really embarrassed by this. Ok. I admit it. I still am.

I hated it when I could overhear my mom giving my siblings lectures about how they shouldn’t tease me because I was sensitive. Nice.

Although I am in desperate need of new clothes, if someone handed me a thousand dollars, I would still spend it on books.

I don’t like to be in charge of group projects, because I feel like my instructions come across as bossy instead of motivating.

I carry all of my worry and stress in my shoulders.

Because of this, I constantly have to remind myself to stand up straight.

I will never recommend a book, that has really moved me, to anyone. I know I shouldn’t, but I seem to take it personally when it doesn’t mean as much to them as it did to me.

I know this is stupid. Everyone has their own experiences and will be affected by things in their own way.

I used to like seeing how long I could be in a room before anyone would actually notice that I was there.

I was honing my ninja skills. You know…just in case.

I have a weird obsession with filling out questionnaires, and find it impossible to take them seriously.

I love the smell of wet cement.

I miss the summers when my brother and sisters and I would sleep out under the stars.

I look forward to our family camping trips because it is the closest thing to getting us back to that time.

Although I have lived in Utah for the past 29 years, I have only been skiing a total of 3 times.

I still wouldn’t say I had been skiing. I would say I went falling.

I have no fear of needles.

Hence to total of eleven piercings I have on my person.

When I step out of my shyness and really let my true self show, I have found that people find it shocking that I don’t drink and don’t have any tattoos.

I think this is very strange.

People often recommend the most fucked up movies to me. Like, Pink Flamingos. I often wonder, what in the world have I said or conveyed to you that would make you think I would like this movie.

If I had to write in cursive in order to save my life….I would die.

I could spend hours messing around with Photoshop. I will look up tutorials on the internet just to learn to Photoshop tricks.

I would like to sew at least one quilt in my lifetime.

I used to know how to weave on an 8 harness loom. I sometimes wish I had access to one still. It was like playing the piano, but you ended up with a beautiful piece of art that you could wear.

One of my weavings was displayed in the State of Utah Annual Art Exhibition.

I am always mistaken as the youngest in my family.

I am the second oldest.

Jeremy and I have read 13 books together.

I read aloud to him at night before we fall asleep.

Or after we’ve done other things…wink wink, nudge nudge.

My favorite sound is hearing Jeremy and Rocket playing together.

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